AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

someone just shoot me now. or shoot scoot. i'm sick of this. so we (me, liz, william, and james) went to the school's homecoming game and scott was there working concessions. and at around fourth quarter he came to sit by me and we talked. it was nice to be able to talk to him again. and i thought i'd be just fine and everything. but apparently not... i've been cussing at a lot of people. i'm terribly upset, and my heart hurts. it sucks. and right now, i'm texting him and well, he just said the STUPIDEST thing he could ever say. i'm freakin pissed right now. i asked him how long he had been debating on breaking up with me and he didn't reply for the longest time. and i finally got something from him and this is what it said, 'i'm thinking about it. cause i don't know how to say this...' and i replied, 'just say it. i don't care what the answer is. i just want to know.' and so he answered saying, 'i was sick of my ups and downs. i really liked you but i knew it was against my parents. so i had the tension and i didn't know if i could say it to you.' my reply was, 'say what? that we were over?' and the last thing i heard from him tonight was, 'yeah... i didn't want to. and tonight i was going to hold your hand but then i remembered i'd broken up with you.' 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

honestly, i want to rip his head off right now. and i'm not a violent person. i just want to scream and hit and make him hurt as much as i am right now. it's REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY annoying how he can make me so mad with a few words. so just shoot me now. i won't hurt anymore. please. just do it. i beg.

cass