Post No. 2 for today.

Here's a happier post than my last one. William and Lizzie sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g (kinda, they haven't officially kissed yet, they're waiting so it's more special and they just don't pick up from where they left off in...May? April? *shrugs*). Anyways, my brother and dear friend have started dating. :) Congrats dear ones!

The mood swinging and post publishing extraordinaire,
Caiti.

Post No. 1 for today

Can I just say I'm tired of having to wheedle and poke and prod to make James do things. In the past we used to be able to just go and do something together. But lately it's become this whole big huge thing to get him to even just talk to me some days. We started just walking and talking on Sunday nights, however, he hasn't wanted to for the last while, and I've have to do everything in my power to get him to even go. And today, I don't even want to deal with it. It's made me frustrated and I'm tired of it. I miss him, and have stretched myself as far as I can to try and keep in touch, but he doesn't seem to have that same desire to go the rest of the way and meet me in the middle. I know that Liz would just tell me to tell him this and get it out in the open. Let him know how I feel, but how can I if he doesn't reply in texts half the time, and a majority of the rest of the time it's in silly little things that really don't pertain to anything. It's just so he can say he texts. Things like "wink", ": )", and "hi". Sigh...sorry for venting. But I had to get it out somehow before I exploded.

Hey look! He actually texted.
Caiti.

I LIVE!!!!!!!!

Anyways. I haven't posted in a long time...to tell you the truth I kinda forgot about this...whoopsies. I haven't been doing much. Hanging out with my wonderful boyfriend and brother and friends. Watching the Office. Going to school, and working on everything that has to do with that. Searching for a decent car that I can actually afford. Working two jobs. Cleaning my room so I don't have to worry about that when I move out in the spring, I'm getting to be so ready for it. Thinking about the interesting styles that people wear on campus. My own cellphone. All of that stuff. It's raining today. I love the rain, except I have a tendency to slip more when it's raining. Oh well. I hit my head three times yesterday on the roof of Cassie's car. So yeah...It's time for history...that's my life in a nutshell from the past month...

~Caiti. :)

Cass

I think that it's good that you forget about Scott, Cass. You couldn't move on until you were ready, and now you seem more ready. I know that you are regretting that you aren't as great of friends with him as before, but I think that will change with time. Look what happened with William. You didn't want to be around him for a long time after you guys broke up... but now you're good friends. I think will work out with Scott eventually. The first step is just getting over him, and you're doing ok. You just needed to be ready to let go.
Elizabeth

wow...

so for some reason during choir rehearsal tonight we were singing 'sure on this shinning night' and it reminded me of scott, i haven't thought of him that much lately... anyway, it reminded me of him because when william, james, cait, liz, and i started singing in this choir, and when i found out we'd be singing sure on this shinning night i got all excited. i LOVE that song so much. and i told him about it. and he said he's never heard it, i told him that he'll have to come to our concert when we sing it because the song is BEAUTIFUL. but alas... he's not going to come. and i don't feel like inviting hime. but back to my story. as i was singing this song today the realization hit me, 'i'm ready to move on. i know this is going to hurt a whole lot, but i'm SICK of feeling so attached to someone that i can't have anymore.' and i started crying. and it was a good ish... type of tears. i don't know why of all days i've realized this, but i think it's finally time to let him go. i know you guys will say that it was time a LONG time ago. but now i'm ready. i'm going to miss the old scott i fell in love with. i'll miss him a whole lot. but forgetting about him is for the better. and i know you two will help me as much as i need. :)

~cassie

Response

I never really thought that you had a lot of problems cass... everyone has hard times but it doesn't seem like you make things worse for yourself... unless there are things I don't know about, I think you're handling things pretty well... but then again I have had a hard time letting go of someone before... maybe it just depends on the type of person... maybe others see it as having problems but I don't because I have dealt with things the same way. I cried for an entire day basically when the last boy broke my heart... and it took me a while to be ok with it. I don't know, maybe I'm not answering any of your questions...

... oh well

lookie see! another post from me!

so i just had a lovely chat with our dear friend william. it was... interesting. we talked about how i was holding up mostly. and he pointed out (and not trying to be mean or offensive) that i have a lot of problems. do i really? i never thought i did. or do i create my own problems? it's something i've been thinking about since i dropped him off. i've always t thought my life was pretty simple. but i never took a step back and looked at it from someone elses point of view. maybe from someone else i seem like i have a lot of problems. but inside my head it feels like i like being hurt. i dunno. it's confusing... and quite twisted. i don't want to be that way. so i guess i should change.

do i really have a lot of problems? maybe it's cuz i don't let things go that often. sorry for my rambling. but... there's just some things that are better written down (in this case typed) than stuck in my brain. so yeah. that's what i'm probably going to think about for then next while. anyhow. good night world.

~cassie

*shrugs*

i can't believe it's been three months sense we started this. how cool. sorry, i'm in an 'eh' type of mood. just shrugging things off. trying not to let anything get to me.

so some good news is I HAS A CAR!!!! my daddy helped me get a car. i loves it so very much. and i'll forever be thankful to how amazing my parents really are. oh! and i gots a job too! it'll be so much fun! i'm superly excited. i start training on monday. and it's going to be so much fun. i've just got to find some paperwork that i misplaced a while ago. yeah. i'm pretty much panicing inside. if i can't find it, i'll call the hiring guy to see what he says. cuz i KNOW it's here somewhere in the mess of my room, i just can't remember where i put it. so yeah. that's my news.

cass

Hard Times

I just wanted you both to know that even though I haven't been telling you everything, I love you very much. There are just some things that I don't think you need to be bothered with, and Cass all ready told me that I can tell her anything and I'm sure Cait feels the same, but I really can't talk about some things... I'm sorry. I knew you guys aren't dumb and would figure out that something was wrong and I'm sorry. I'm dealing with some stuff right now and I know that eventually I'll be ok, I just hope you guys will stick around.
Love you,
Elizabeth

um...

So I really don't know what to write, I just figured I'd post something since nothing has been posted for a while. School's been going well, it's midterm time, so I've been studying when I can and so on. I've taken two exams already, still don't know what I got on my first one. My Biology professor hasn't posted it on blackboard yet. But I know what I got on my religion exam, I got an 84%! A B! I'm so happy about that. Anyways, I really have no idea what to say...so that's all...

Caiti

nevermind...

sorry for the explosion. i just couldn't handle it at the time. i'm much better now.

and i'm very sorry my emotions have a mind of their own. it's driving me bonkers.

cassie

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

someone just shoot me now. or shoot scoot. i'm sick of this. so we (me, liz, william, and james) went to the school's homecoming game and scott was there working concessions. and at around fourth quarter he came to sit by me and we talked. it was nice to be able to talk to him again. and i thought i'd be just fine and everything. but apparently not... i've been cussing at a lot of people. i'm terribly upset, and my heart hurts. it sucks. and right now, i'm texting him and well, he just said the STUPIDEST thing he could ever say. i'm freakin pissed right now. i asked him how long he had been debating on breaking up with me and he didn't reply for the longest time. and i finally got something from him and this is what it said, 'i'm thinking about it. cause i don't know how to say this...' and i replied, 'just say it. i don't care what the answer is. i just want to know.' and so he answered saying, 'i was sick of my ups and downs. i really liked you but i knew it was against my parents. so i had the tension and i didn't know if i could say it to you.' my reply was, 'say what? that we were over?' and the last thing i heard from him tonight was, 'yeah... i didn't want to. and tonight i was going to hold your hand but then i remembered i'd broken up with you.' 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

honestly, i want to rip his head off right now. and i'm not a violent person. i just want to scream and hit and make him hurt as much as i am right now. it's REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY annoying how he can make me so mad with a few words. so just shoot me now. i won't hurt anymore. please. just do it. i beg.

cass

Okay.

Okay...so we can all ignore my yelling thing. I just needed to yell, and everyone was asleep, and it was late, so I didn't want to wake anyone up by yelling for reals, so I yelled on here. Didn't help as much as yelling in really life to tell the truth...anyways.

Yes I did get the job with Liz! It's going to be fun, I start tomorrow. :) And since it's a campus job, I have to go into the employment center today to fill out my papers and stuff. Thing is I'm still going to be working at my other job Friday nights. I'm not too worried about it though, since it'll only be Fridays, and I think I'll be able to handle there better, with just one day a week. My position there will most likely get changed though. I was starting to be keys, but we'll see what happens.

Anyways. I think Scott's been stupid about the whole thing really. He can't just expect it all to go away just because he broke up with you Cass. I mean really, he did all that stuff, and for one felt guilty for it (if he felt he shouldn't have in the first place, he shouldn't have done it) and blames it on you? Hello, you were totally fine with waiting for him until he was ready. He's the one who...ugh...sorry. It's seeming really hypocritical, and I have a thing with people being hypocritical. I also have a thing with being very protective, so I'm barely stopping myself from telling him that lying about the whole thing and blaming Cass for it is idiotic, that he's being immature, and that I don't want him to come close to you anymore Cass...dang. That all sounds like something that my dad would do...that he has done...maybe that's why I'm not doing it. I dunno.

So yes, I'm terrified of spiders. Terrified out of my silly little head, that seems to be going fifty bajillion miles per hour lately, and one of them crawled on me when I was laying in bed last night. I freaked out, and had problems sleeping cuz I felt like they were crawling all over me. So I kept twitching a lot, and twitching so much that I'd wake myself up thinking there were more spiders on me. James kept saying that I would be fine, and to just sleep, that there were no more spiders. But everytime I would start to sleep it would be like there were more of them all over. It wasn't a fun night.

The spider fearing, protective, crazy girl.
Caiti.

Confusion

I really hate to be confused... also, I hate to fall behind. I hate the feeling that I've "dropped the ball" and that I'm not setting my priorities right... anyway, back to what I was saying. I hate being confused. I am SO confused right now and I don't like it. I don't know which emotion to feel, I don't know who to talk to, and if I actually do talk to someone I don't know how to explain things, I don't know what path to take. I feel so extraordinarily alone. I haven't felt this lonely in a long time. I just don't know what to think anymore...
Anyway, enough about me... Cass is handling this whole thing really well. I've been keeping a close eye on her to see how she's coping and she really is doing well.
Cait did get the job! I'm so excited! We'll be working together! It's going to be great! You're going to love it Cait!
I better go to sleep
a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world
Elizabeth

one more thing!

AND! he's not planning on telling anyone that we kissed. so he's going to go around LYING about that. STUPID BOY!!! can i scream now? *deep breath* k. i'm done.

cass

HUh....

um... caiti? are you ok? what in the?!? you gotta tell me... PLEASE!?!?!?! *puppy dog eyes*

so um, these past few days have probably been the hardest that i've gone through... scott broke up with me saturday night... :'( and oh boy! do i feel stupid. it's mostly because we got way too close, you know his promise to his sister, he broke that. and um... kinda made out too... ugh. and apparently it was MY fault that we did. ugh.... *bangs head on desk a bajillion times* WHY DOES HE HAVE TO BE SO YOUNG!?!?!?!?!?! why can't he be my age? that would make this a LOT easier. so yeah. oh! and he says he still loves me, and wants to be friends. earlier today i told him that i still loved him and i also want to be friends. but i had another break down during the movie we watched tonight, so i'm no longer in a good mood. i'm pissed and depressed. it SUCKS! man.... i wish i could control my emotions. but i guess it's impossible. UGH!!!!!! *smashes head against wall a bajillion, thrillion, million times* i just wish my thoughts and memories would quit torturing me. it's literally hell wanting something you can't have that you've had before. someone just shoot me now. i'll feel better. honest. i will.

cass

...

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Caiti

Willie Boy

Well, I almost had a chance to talk to him about it last night. We were going to go to a movie together, a little brother sister outing, or at least that's what he had planned, but I had to go to work. I wasn't able to go. I was sad and felt bad, cuz he was trying to make it up to me about all the times he had promised to take me to a movie, and it had fallen through. :( Oh well, we'll find another time. Soon hopefully, I'm still kinda worried.

So according to Liz I have a new job, I will be working with her. I"m excited, but the lady hasn't called me yet, so I can't do anything about it. I'm going to have to wait and see if she calls back today, but if not, I'm gonna call her tomorrow evening before choir. I really want this new job. I'll most likely keep my old job, just for one night each week just to keep up hours this semester until I can get more at my new job. :) I'm excited, this'll be good for me. Working retail has started to get really hard on me, and so doing something else will help.

Well, I fell asleep in my Biology class today, that's my own fault for talking to James until 2 in the morning, but when I woke up, they were talking about bear attacks and what to do in that scenario. Mainly the difference between grizzly bears and black bears. It was a very odd conversation to wake up into.

The sleepy, but happy
Cait.

<3

so things have been going pretty great. :) the only thing about william that bothers me is that he's RATHER immature. it's pretty gross sometimes. my younger brother isn't that bad... anyway... talking about it isn't going to do much.

the letter from chris was GREAT! i miss that kid so much. but he's doing the right thing. apparently he's been talking about the gospel to other guard members (i think) out there, and he's handing out book of mormons and everything! i'm so proud of him. :) he's changed so much.

things with scott are going GREAT! lol. um, he's been pretty happy lately. he realized talking to me when he's feeling sad isn't such a great idea when i'm depressed. so he tries to avoid that. and i realized EVERY relationship has their ups and downs. and it shows how strong a relationship can be if you pull through those downs. :) i'm proud to say our relationship is very strong. (for the most part. lol...) and! i realized this is the longest i've been with a boy. since june second. :) i still remember that day. a bunch of friends went to the movie prince caspian and i came in a bit late and lizzie told me there was a seat right next to scott with my name on it. :) she's too good to me.

so yeah. that's pretty much the contents of my mind for now. :)

~cassie

Concussion...

So, as Cait mentioned, I have a concussion. How, you may ask? I hit my head on. my. fridge. So stupid. James was making jokes and i laughed and hit my head. Sure just a bump on the noggin... right? Wrong. It still hurt three days later. So, I succumb to the absurdities of my friends and go to the doctor. Completely unnecessary. Turns out, I have a concussion and my brain is swollen. How dumb. So now I get to sit around and do nothing so that my heart rate won't go up so my brain will stop swelling... yipee. *thick sarcasm*. All because I'm a stupid ditz. I told my mom about the incident and she threatened to come to my house and bubble wrap everything... I didn't think that was very funny... 

Anyway, Cass and I got a letter from Chris today! It was so sweet. I miss him so much. I just want him to come home. But I had a very momentous thing happen on September 11, I'm ok with Chris being gone. I was angry before, but I understand why he's doing it now. I still miss him, but I'm proud of him. 

Cait is right. William has been acting strange the past couple weeks. It seems like something is wrong but he won't talk to anyone. He won't talk to me no matter how much I ask, and I know he isn't talking to Cass because she's a bit annoyed with him, and Cait says he's not talking to her and if he was going to talk to anyone it would be his sister. I wish I could help him, but I don't know what's wrong. Cait, you should try to get it out of him...

Anyway, I don't have much else to write so I better get back to doing nothing. 

a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,

Elizabeth

Hello

Well here I am at school again, waiting between classes. I have an hour until my next class starts. so here I am, sitting in the basement of the building, typing on my computer, and sitting on the bench nearest to an outlet so that I can keep my computer plugged in. All the while waiting for someone to wake up and start talking to me. The next person to wake up will be Liz since she has the same class as me at ten. Unless she's not feeling well. Her head has really been hurting her since Thursday night. She got a concussion, and it's not treating her well. Feel better Lizzie!

Then Friday night, I spent the night with Liz and Cass. But first we were over at James' house for a few hours. My brother was being anti social that night and stayed upstairs playing Fable pretty much the whole time. (It's making me worried, William usually tells me about stuff that's bothering him, and he's not even telling me, just saying not to worry about it. It's got me worried.) Then me and James had a wrestling match. Major fun. Even though we killed each other's noses. He got mine first, he tackled me, and his full weight, through his shoulder, crushed down on my nose. There was a crack, and I didn't trust myself to sit up for a while. It didn't bleed, I'm not prone to nose bleeds thank goodness, but half of my face went all tingly and numb. My nose still aches a bit, but then, a while later, after we had gone back to wrestling, James started to tickle me. I grabbed a sheet from the laundry he hadn't put away and flung it at him, trying to use it to help me pull him off, when his face was closer than I thought it would be. The hard bone part of my wrist hit him right on his nose. Causing his nose to do the same cracking thing, and lay on the ground. However, James is prone to have nose bleeds unlike mine, so his nose started bleeding. His nose still hurts as well.

Now though, I've just been teasing him that his nose is just more of a whiner. My nose hurt just as much, if not worse, and his nose just wanted all the attention so whinned about it. All in all it was just a fun night, with the exception of worries about William. William seems to be better, so it may just've been one of those days, but I'm still worried about him.

Well, I'm off to text James until he wakes up. He gave me permission to do that so I'm not completely lonely and bored out of my mind between classes.

:)
Caiti

:(

so we have this really good friend that joined the national guard, his name is chris. at the moment he's at basic training. but it's so hard not having him here. he was always so happy and had a very contagious personality. he was always willing to help out. and i miss him. a lot right now. he called liz's phone on sunday and we were able to talk to him. it was great. :) right now i'm not that afraid for him. what if the war doesn't end any time soon...? what if he's called to iraq. i don't think i could handle that. even the thought is bringing tears to my eyes... man, i love that boy like he's my own brother. i don't want him to get hurt. and one of my good friends, annie, is dating chris. i don't want her hurt either. but, i do think he made the right choice. i'm just scared...

~cass

GAH!

Okay, so what did they do? I can still act surprised. You'd think I'd know especially since William's my brother and he did it too apparently...? But no, I haven't seen William in a few days. We're all so busy, it makes it hard to see people. Maybe James or William will come with Lizzie when she comes to pick me up after my last class...hm...I think I'll ask and see.

So there's this movie called 'La Vita e Bella' or 'Life is Beautiful'. I love this movie. And I just found out about a film festival, where just a park area up the canyon, they play a movie each night outside. It's $8 a ticket, so kinda expensive, but they're playing La Vita e Bella this weekend, I really want to go see it, and think it would be fun to go outside to see it. I do have it rented for free from the library at the moment too...so that might be a better idea. Especially since we'd most likely take Lizzie's car, and it's having fun overheating. Oh well, I'll see what people think.

The movie is an Italian film that was produced in the nineties. It's about a man named Guido who has an amazing smiling personality that he never looses throughout the movie. I watched it in my AP Lit class last year. It's a movie that I don't want to give anything away, cuz I'm hoping to be able to watch it with Cass and Lizzie this weekend, and I don't want to give anything away. :)

Well, James should be getting out of class now, and onto chat, so I'm going to go chat with him for a bit before my next class.

La vita e bella
Caiti

eh.

well... there's always a part of us girls that want a man, or for my case, a man that'll grow up. ugh... its just one of those human parts of us that wants something we don't have. we just have to get on with life.

today's been sorta productive. i signed up for a class at uvu institute! it's teachings of president monson. i'm supperly excited. i'm just not sure  how i'm getting there yet. and all that jazz. but i can't wait. that's for sure. :) i'm a little nervous though. but it'll be fun. :)

so james got cait a surprise. well that's what he told her. but it's more like james and william did something, not stupid, but random. i can't say cuz cait doesn't know yet. she'll have to see for herself. lol. ugh. and william is making stupid comments again,  but i'm just ignoring them for now. boys can be so dumb. but whatever. i'll live.

and thank you cait and liz for being there for me. :) you guys are amazing.

~cass

whoops

So, I haven't posted in a while, but here I am! I'm so excited to be living with Cass! It's a blast! School, as Cait said, has started. It's been busy but I've kept on top of things so far. I'm really enjoying it! 

Cass, I'm so sorry about what's going on with Scott. I hope you know that you can talk to me whenever. You know where I sleep so just let me know if you need me!! ;) 

So, I'm sad to admit that the girl part of me is getting the best of me lately... I really want a boy... I know that sounds TOTALLY ridiculous... but I really do. And I'm the last girl in the world that would be expected to feel this way. I surprised myself... Unfortunately, I have no cure for this problem. I keep finding jerks... Ugh... 

Anyway, I've got to go do laundry...

~a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,

         Elizabeth

...

Cass. Call me anytime. Just rant at me, I don't mind.

Caiti.

i'm doin better

i think i just needed some time to NOT think. and honestly, my brain REALLY needs to take a chill pill every once in a while. things are good. scott's biggest problem now is to take an amazing moment, and pick it apart and ruin it. ugh... i'm just going to have to do my best at making him stop judging himself.

and things with william are better. it just bothered me that day. i think i'm finally starting to calm down from this whole week. wow this week has been crazy...

~cass

Yup.

I've had some problems with Scott lately too. It gets to me that he gets all grossed out when me and James are being couple-y, and yet for some reason it's alright to be all couple-y with you Cass. I know it's little in comparison to what other people have done, but still, it's bothersome. Almost like he expects that we should act differently with each other when he's around, which isn't right. But all in all, I'm a little touchy when it comes to anything about me and James because it seems for the most part, that everyone finds something wrong with it, and expect something from us.

And William, he's been the tough guy for a long time, and believe me I know. He's let out how he feels about getting beat up on, and he's decided that he doesn't want to be belittled all the time. He's all for helping you vent and all that stuff, just for future reference, you may just want to tell him what's going on with it, rather than just doing it. He takes it more seriously than he's let on.

The protective sister, who's still bored.

Caiti.

... ?

sometimes i'm glad i didn't start school. just the thought of all that homework makes me shudder. most the time i don't even want to go back. but i know scott wouldn't like that. ..... but he's supposed to like me for who i am, right? i honestly don't know what to do with that boy anymore. i swear sometimes it's like he has a multiple personality. and when i'm doing things with liz, cait, william, and james, like going to a certain movie, he'll belittle me. he'll make me feel like i'm not choosing the right thing to do. and he'll make me feel guilty for what i'm doing. but he's so hypocritical he doesn't even know it! gah. i just don't know. i still love him. but it's so frustrating. david, his best friend, or i should say FORMER best friend can't stand scott anymore. even scott's best friend is finding it hard to be around him! maybe it's that new 'sister' of his, kami, that's affecting him this way. but i wouldn't want to tell him to forget about her cuz he's too darn caring. geez i'm bitter. i'm just sick of him thinking what i do isn't good enough for him. FACE IT SCOTT, WE ALL HAVE FAULTS! EVEN YOU!!!

*deep breath* alright. i think i'm better now. i needed a good venting. usually it's easier to vent to someone who can give me advise right away but right now i just want all this crap out of my brain. it's sorta like writing in my journal. but this way millions of people can read it. bah. who cares.

oh! another thing that's been driving me to the point of murder is freakin william! gah! so, i've been bashing on him a lot lately, just cuz i can, and cuz i've needed to take my anger out. and honestly, i thought he could've taken it. but i guess not. i guess he's more weak than he likes to show, cuz he got all offended and started ignoring me. I HATE BEING IGNORED!!! i wanted to strangle that kid so many times! you have no idea. he pissed me off SO much that day. i don't think i've been that angry in a long time. boys are so stupid...

anyway. that's pretty much what's been on my mind lately. yeah. i've been pretty angry. i'm not entirely sure why. i'm thinking it's cuz i missed church this week. but i don't know. i'm hoping it'll all go away soon...

~cass

School...

Well, school has started. Me and Liz go to school together, have one class together, and pretty sure that I'll occasionally go to her history class rather than mine. Which will be loads of fun. :) But guess what, only in school 4 days so far, and I've already fallen behind in one of my classes, I had a reading assignment that I forgot to do (whoops) and I don't even have the textbook here for me to look at and get the reading assignment done before my class at two, and it's only almost ten. However, Liz isn't here yet, and I left a message that her and Cass will hopefully get asking to bring that textbook with Liz when she comes, and hopefully I'll have time to get that reading done before class today. This is all if they get the message...

So Cass is our honorary floater. So's William to tell you the truth but he has a job, our lovely Cass does not. I've been telling her jobs that are open, but so far i haven't heard anything from here.

James is in school too, he only has class Tuesdays and Thursdays, but I have it everyday, and Tuesdays and Thursdays...I only have two classes those days. School starts and we get so busy, and we go to different schools. It's going to be harder to spend time together. But we've done okay so far. We're all in a community choir that meets every Thursday night, so we'll have something those days.

The fourth season of the Office came out this week on DVD. We had an office party Tuesday and Wednesday night to watch it. However, I worked Wednesday night, so I haven't seen the last half of the season, but I have seen the season finale. So all together I've only seen a quarter of the whole. Four episodes, the first three and the last one. I'm going to have to borrow the rest of it from James, as soon as his family is done with it.

Well that's enough of me rambling between classes hoping for something to do to amazingly pop out of no where. *shrugs* That's what I get for scheduling three hours between my first class and my last two.

--Caiti

hello

Well, first, if you were confused by why Cass was saying that she was talented because she was posting while my crazy brother was sitting behind her, it's because the guys don't know about this blog. This is something that us girls are keeping secret from them. :)

I had something very deep and moving to share, at least i thought it was, but I don't remember what it was...so instead I will share a joke. This is a favorite of mine. It gets me every time. :)

There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Wow! It's hot in here!" The second muffin says, "WHOA!!! A talking muffin!"

*giggles to self* Wow, I'm such a nerd, but that's okay. I'm love in spite of that.

I'm enjoying having Cass and Liz only a block away. It's loads of fun. :) I think the best was when my little sister Cindy was walking home from school when I was helping them move in. She stopped and looked at me, and then asked, "What are you doing?" I told her I was helping Cassie and Liz move in, she looked at me like I was absolutely crazy and said, "But Cassie doesn't live there!" It made me laugh. so I explained to her that Cassie was moving in there, and that this is her house now.

But yes, I reallyl should go find something for breakfast, and brush my rat's nest of hair, gotta go buy my books today. Whoopee. $300 on textbooks, the favorite thing to spend money on. At least that's the only thing I need to pay for.

"The end will justify the beans"
~Caiti

i'm talented

so i'm posting this AS william sits on liz's bed right now. i'm good. :) so tonight scott told me that it was really hard to not kiss me, cuz of his darn promise to his sister he can't. and he said that he wishes i would just randomly kiss him. GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm like FREAKING out on the inside. you have NO idea. so... i dunno what to do now. lol. i'm just freaking cuz i have the possibility of kissing him now. GAH! i'm happy... :)

~cass

i'm finally posting.

sorry i've been gone for so long. i bet you guys have missed me. ;D lol. life's been treating me pretty good. other than the fact that i REALLY need a job. i moved out though. i'm living with liz now. :D and it's not too far from cait. there's not much to say. today's been pretty slow for me. i was supposed to unpack once i got home from dropping liz off at work. but i haven't done much... i'm so lazy... :p oh well. it makes life interesting.

~cass

Ya, She really did... Cass tried to text her and she had to ask who it was... I think it's funny!!! And yes I got your message... and no I don't remember what you asked... :D I'm amazing... Anyway, I'm glad that you see us as good friends Caiti! You've helped me through my fair share of problems and I'm glad I could be there for you. Well I better get back to work. Talk to you girls later!!

P.S. We'll talk to James and William about swimming tomorrow night.

~ a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,
Elizabeth

wow...

Wait! So Jessica deleted Cass from her phone? What drover her to do that? and Julia? How do you know she's mad? You know maybe I shouldn't ask these questions here, but in person...crazy...did all this happen after Sunday? I feel so bad for James though. He doesn't want to loose any friendships so he's doing what he can to stay friends with him, but I need to break off from Julia and Jessica and it's not helping him stay close. *sigh* Hopefully this'll all work out. I don't want to get hurt anymore, or cause anyone else to get hurt...I fell kinda responsible for all of this, since they're problems were with me, and I pulled you guys all into this.

Swimming would be so much fun! I love going swimming, and did you get my message Liz?...why am I asking you all these questions on here? This isn't an email or anything, this is a place to post and share my thoughts. Sorry world.

Can I just say on thing though, I love you guys! You've stuck by me and helped me through so much. :)

Curious Cait.

uh... i dunno... there isn't really one subject.

well, for starters... i really think that Jessica and Julia hate us... Apparently Jessica deleted Cass from her phone... wow, how petty... she really hit below the belt. Honestly, I'm really glad that she is going back to school. And Julia is two years older and no more mature... it's ridiculous. I hope that eventually they'll understand...

Next thing on my mind: Ryan, the missionary... after seeing him at the farewell on Sunday, I remember how attracted to him I am. I talked to him today and I think that we're going to hang out and see what happens. I haven't forgotten how rude he was, I just want to give it a chance. He's really making me confused. And on top of the strange feelings for Ryan, I still need to figure out what to do about Shane. I still haven't said anything to him about the date in the park when bore his soul to me... I don't really know what to say to him. I guess I'm going to continue to be his friend and go on dates but as of right now, I don't have feelings for him.

Next thing on my mind: I'm so excited to move out!! This will be so much different than my first place because Cass is my roomate :) I can't wait! I think we should go swimming on Wednesday night after we get our first day of moving done... since the five of us will already be hanging out... :)

Well, I think I've said enough for one post, I better get back to ardently waiting for missionaries to come ask for their packages... it'll be a blasty blast!!

~a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,
Elizabeth

i'm posting i'm posting. ;)

Well I haven't posted in a while, and they've (Cassie and Lizzie) have decided that that's unexceptable. So I'm posting, right this second. Anyways...I'm not really thinking of anything right now. Mainly just tired and sore. Got a little bruised this weekend. Curtesy of Scott. Riding in the bed of his truck with William and James, and he decides to slam on his breaks. I get flung and then squashed under William and James against the back window of the truck. He also had some pipes back there that cut one foot rather nicely (I keep having to change the bandaids cuz it bleeds right through) and my should and foot are brusied. The other foot just got sticky cuz William's pop got spilled all over it. *shrugs* Oh well. What can I do? I'm a big enough clutz that I've hurt myself worse.

Sore sore sore Cait.

Cass and Kevin

I'm glad I could help!! It was fun :) even though Joe showed up and kinda ruined the "mood"!!! :D

So Kevin left for basic training yesterday... (FYI for the blogger world: Kevin is my brother) It made me really sad. I miss him already... But it will be fine... I get to go to his graduation in October and I'll see him then. And this will make him stronger physically and spiritually. He gave me one of his dog tags to put on my keys to make me think of him :) 

Anyway, I'm excited to go to Dark Knight tonight girlies!!! It'll be fun :)

~a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,

Elizabeth

:D i'm happy!!!

oh my GOSH!!! thank you so much lizzie!! that was a PERFECT idea. i'm so much better now! i love pity parties! except for the fact that my stomach is about to explode! lol. and i finally talked to scott about what was going on. he feels that we're too close, and it's getting harder for him to be good the closer we get. and he said he realized the times he loves me most is just when we're holding hands or he's got his arm around me. :) he's just trying to do the right thing. i was being paranoid, like usual. *rolls eyes* but it's all good now. but i loved watching those movies tonight. it helped a lot. :) like a lot a lot. i love you guys!!!

~cassie

Cass

I'm sorry hon... I kinda worried about things changing once he went back to school, and retreat was part of that. Don't worry to much, Scott is a great guy!! Things will work out how they're supposed to... I know that's hard... trust me, I've had experience... I know it's hard to accept things as they come... especially if it's opposite of what you think will make you happy... but just remember that we ARE always here for you...
Lets have a pity party tonight! Sometimes it helps to let the depression run it's course for a night and then get back to business... we could watch chick flicks and eat yummy food :) our own little FHE :) Cait probably can't come though... but I really don't want William and James there... they distract from depression rather than letting it sink in... I kinda want to just let it come... you know?
Anyway, tell me what you think...

~a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,
Elizabeth

ugh...

depression sucks. can some one just shoot me now and get it over with. i'd like to not feel anymore. it might help with some things... actually it would help with a LOT of things. i don't know if it's just me. but things with scott aren't how they used to be. stupid... i guess if you guys don't want to shoot me then at least take my brain away. it's evil...

~cass (sorry i'm being stupid, but i gotta vent to someone)

wow...

there's so much truth in that last paragraph cait. wow... i've always been taught that in order for others to love you, you have to love yourself. i've found that that's the hardest thing to do. but as the years go by i realize, i am a great person. but i'm the person i am because of my friends. i owe so much to my friends. makes me love them even more. and every one of my friends are amazing. there isn't words to express my feelings and thanks for them. when something exciting happens in my life, they're right there by my side, celebrating with me. when something devastating happens they're right there comforting me, helping me feel better. :) i love you guys. it's usually you two cait and liz, always by my side.. and william, james, and scott help too. i don't know what i would do without my friends.

i don't know where i found this quote, but i like it a lot. 'its the times we're so crazy people think we're high, the times we're so bored we laugh till we cry, all the inside jokes and remember whens, these are the reasons we'll always be best friends' :)

~cass

p.s. and this one is probably my favorite out of all quotes. it's long. but it's amazing. 'As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back. Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.'

My Thoughts in Return to Cass and Liz

For all eternity...wow...that's so...so...I can't even describe this feeling. *shudders from tingles* Yes I have doubted, believe me, there are still some things that I can't let myself think on too much or I get all worried/doubty about it. But there are other things that I know for a fact, no one could make me budge from them. Then I just think of who I would be without it, what kind of trouble I would've gotten into and all that stuff, and I'm so grateful for it.

I've wished I were shorter...I think I would like being shorter, and curvier...rather than the tall straight stick I am. But at the same time, I'm glad I'm me, I can't see me any other way. You know?

Tonight I had the greatest surprise. I walk out of work and I walk down to my car and see what I think is a dog sitting by it, I get worried, and slow down walking, to add light to the dark corner of the parking lot I unlocked the doors of the car with the button on the keychain. As soon as I did this William jumps out yelling. Soon after Cassie, Lizzie, and JAMES! pop out too. Surprising me after a long, hard day of work. The car had been silly stringed, and covered with streamers. James brought me flowers. :) It made my night. Love you guys!

Anyways, I think that when you first realize that you can't change how you look, is the first step to accepting yourself and growing to love yourself...everyone should work towards that, because girls at younger and younger ages are becoming self concious and doing stupid things because they don't think they're pretty. I think that's crap, everyone is beautiful. We're all made in the image of God, how do you think he feels if all we do is look in the mirror and say that it's ugly, when it's His face too. Just a thought...

Life is good. (love those shirts, they make me smile)

Cait

oh boredom...

Today has been a very relaxed but very boring day so far. I've accomplished several things but I'm feeling very dead. So, to ease my bored mind, I'm writing here. 

Do you every think about how people see you? Do you ever find yourself looking at someone else and wondering what it would be like to be them? I quite often find myself trying to figure out what other people are thinking. I try to see me from their point of view. Sometimes I wish I could see other people's perspective. I think that would be a very handy skill. 

The human race is so self centered. We all think about our lives all the time. Even when we think about others, it's still a part of OUR lives. Have you ever thought about all the million things that are happening just in you neighborhood? And how every single one of those people have tons of things to think about and to do? We all lead such separated lives. It's overwhelming just to think of all the things happening in my apartment complex. But when you take that perspective and apply that just to your home town... state... country... and then the whole world... It's amazing how complicated our race is. The only way that this planet and life form could have been is through God. I don't know why people would argue that... It's so obvious... 

Anyway, enough of my odd view on our existence... I probably ought to get back to being bored. Things like this are probably better off never leaving my mind... 

~ a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,

Elizabeth

:)

not just for life, cait, you'll be spending eternity with him. :) isn't that an amazing feeling. have you guys ever doubted our religion? i do sometimes. and then i think, we get to be with our family, our loved ones, forever all doubt washes away. that's all i could ever ask for. being with the people i love. :) it makes me happy.

CAIT!!! i'm getting all goosebumpy!!! it's another plan of happines!!! XD lol. and liz? i'm excited to meet him. we should totally have a double date, and we can include cait and have a group date thingy. that would be fun. don't ya think?

*sigh* life is good. :)
~cass

well...duh!

I sure hope he's looking forward to come home and see me. I'm sure excited that he'll be back when I get home from work tonight. :) Gives work a silver lining, and hopefully doesn't make today feel longer than it is. Anyways, I've missed him...

So I'm watching Penelope. It's a cute movie, the first time I watched it was with William and James. William decided that she looks cuter with the pig nose than without. I think she's just cute in general, but whatever. *shrugs*

Anyways, I've noticed I say anyways a lot. It's usually what I say to pass time on when I can't find anything better to say...

Have a wonderful day!

Caiti

LOL!!

Wow Cait!!! I bet James will be excited to come home to a girlfriend that has stars in her eyes, all ready to get married!!! 

~ a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,

Elizabeth

A WEDDING!

I just got back from a wedding from another close friend of mine, it was so cute! As soon as she walked in, Jeremy's face was so happy, he was almost crying. He had so much love in his face while she walked toward him, and he stared at her the rest of the ceremony. It was so amazing.

Then after they kissed, Carol said, "That was good." It was funny, she also practically shouted I do. :)

I can't wait for my wedding now, to see the man I love and I will share the rest of my life with, looking at me like that. :)

*sigh*
Caiti

hmmm...

:P your self Cass!!! and I'm glad things worked out with Scott. And I understand where you're coming from Cait. I can usually trust guys more than girls... but just in the past month it seems like they're just as bad as girls sometimes... I guess it's just the losers I can't trust. I just don't want to be hurt again. 

Anyway, I just got back from my date with this guy I met in DC and it was really nice and he's definitely interested, but I don't know how I feel about him. He's cool I suppose,  but he has no intentions of serving a mission. I don't know how I feel about that.  You girls will have to meet him and tell me what you think of him.  Well that's all for me!

~a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,

Elizabeth

a thing.

"Remember if the world didn't suck so much, we'd all fall off."

I don't know who said this first, but I like it. :D

Caiti

my post. :D

Me personally, I trust guys more than I trust girls. Guys have given me more of a reason to trust them than girls have. Guys, if they have a problem, they'll plain out tell you. There's nothing secretive about it. While girls will pretend to be all sweet and friendly to your face, while behind your back they're doing a bunch of crap. And it stays like that until you find out somehow, and then POW! they're suddenly screaming at you in the ahllways, bashing you down in anyway possible, and threatening you. You find yourself alone, with everyone thinking your the bad guy in the whole thing....sorry, if you can't tell I've had some experience with this.

Guys have never done anything like that to me. I'm not saying that they've never gotten mad at me, or not liked me. It's just at least they're willing to tell you, and not have to deal with all that crap. They just say, hey don't like you, and that's the end of it. You know, they know, it's all good. Who knows, maybe I've just known a lot of really cool guys, and a lot of crappy girls. *shrugs* This is just my experience.

-Caiti

come on...

liz! you've always been an interest to guys. :p some are more forward than others. and the past few guys just don't know the right way to go about their... actions or feelings. they're all pretty dumb in their own special way. just like every other guy out there. it's just something we've all had to get used to. i'm still working on it. there's times when i could scream and yell at scott. but i don't cuz i know it'll get me NOWHERE. like last night... that was an interesting night. i wanted to yell so bad. you have no idea. he was being so STUPID!!! there's a few things that are different between us that's never bothered him before. and last night all of a sudden he felt like because of those things we shouldn't be together. GAH!!!!! i wanted to hit something. but everything's better now. i guess relationships have to have hard times. just to test how strong they are. i guess i'm not that strong. i really wanted to give up. i hate being so angry at someone. especially if it's the someone i love most in this world. ugh... anger should die. hey girlies. lets kill anger k? that would be fun. :)

~cass

Oh GEEZ!!

So, I don't understand men!! I've spent most 0f my life as "one of the guys". I've never been a hot girl or someone worth looking at.  But NOW I've got all these silly boys chasing me. The worst part is that at first, I was so flattered that I gave some of them a chance... and you know where that lead? I'll tell you. I. WAS. USED. By every last one of them... so now, I've got tons of drama and a few new guys interested and I don't know if I can trust them. So what am I supposed to do? Become a spinster at the age I am? Give up on men, never trust another one of them? I think I liked it better when I wasn't being chased. I wanna be "one of the guys" again... anyway, enough of my ranting! 

~ a raggedy ann in a barbie doll world,

Liz

um...

Just to say...if anyone's a ditz. It's Cassie. :)

"Love the skin your in."

Caiti

diclaimer!

This is just a response to Cass's blog about "the guys". Just because the numbers are even and James is with Caiti and Scott is with Cass, does NOT mean I am interested in William. Or vise versa... although we've dated before... but that doesn't mean ANYTHING!! Cass dated William too so HAH!!!

Anyway, short story shorter, I'm NOT with William :D

~Liz

people in our lives

first james. he's dating our very own caiti!!! :O for the past... quite a while. they're SSOOOOOOOO in love. ;)

then there's william. he's um, CURRENTLY single. but that doesn't mean no ones interested. you should ask caiti. she's got a list. *wink wink* he's her brother. of course she knows.

then there's scott. he's mine. and no one can have him. :D and he's tall, dark, and handsome. the very best.

and those three boyies are the guys we spend most our time with. they are amazing beyond reason. and yes, we've had our off days with them. but we still love them no matter what. :)

~cass

uh... HI!

*points to self* this is me! me is cassie. just so you know. (in case you can't see me) ah! lets hope you can't see me. that would be a bit scary... i hope no one's watching me... yikes. *locks doors and windows in the house* phew. ok. i think i'm good now...

don't you love how certain things guys say will contradict what they've said before? it drives me CRAZY!! sometimes i want to say 'just shoot me now so i don't have to listen to this' ugh... k. no more complaining. HAPPY TIME!!!! *stands up and dances in circles for ten minutes then sits back down* wow... what a work out. that was fun. time for bed. good night.

~cass

Dizzy Liz!!

Hi! I'm Elizabeth! Otherwise known as Dizzy Liz! So, I don't really know what i'm supposed to write... but I'm sure it'll be interesting!!

Blog, The First

Hello World Wide Web! We're here to give you another look on life, from our own point of view. We are Caitlyn and Cassie, (with the occasional post from Elizabeth). :) Here we will ramble about our thoughts, our lives, and just anything that happens to be passing through our minds.

Anyways...that's us. Crazy Cait, Sassy Cass, Dizzy Liz...and now I'm just having too much fun with...what are those called again? I can't seem to remember. Oh well. I think that's a sign that I'm done for tonight.

Keep Loving Life!

Caiti :)